blue flamingos

Five things John misses about Earth

Fandom: Stargate Atlantis

Category/Rated: Gen, G

Year/Length: 2009/~549 words

Disclaimer: No, I don't own them, for which I should think they're profoundly grateful.

Feedback: Yes please. Even if it's bad. Especially if it's bad.



Chinese food. Really, having absolute free choice over what he eats, but he's lived most of his life under someone else's control of his food choices, so missing that is sort of pointless. But Chinese food, the kind that comes in Styrofoam boxes and probably doesn't taste anything like real Chinese food, the kind that you'd buy in China, and being able to get it whenever he wants, and it being a regular thing, not a huge treat because he's back on Earth for something he doesn't want to be doing, and it's one of the few things he can safely do to remind himself he likes this planet.


Privacy. Getting sick without everyone knowing. Getting sick without everyone knowing what he's sick with. Losing his father and grieving without feeling like everyone's watching him do it. Not having two hundred of his closest friends and colleagues know what he chooses to wear to bed. Having a bad day and knowing that if he wants to run it off, he won't have three people watching a dot that represents him while he does it.


Sex. Not that he never has sex in Atlantis, although he certainly doesn't have anything like as much as people seem to think he does. But the kind of sex he can have with someone who he'll never, baring improbable comedy movie coincidences, see again, the kind of sex he can have with someone else who's military, who gets it, all of it, without needing an explanation or a discussion. Basically, the kind of sex that he can't have when the people he wants to have it with are all under his command, and always under his feet.


Children. Children who aren't living out their entire lives before they die at 25, children who aren't having the most traumatic day of their lives, children who are just regular kids who get up and go to school and skin their knees and get read bedtime stories. Which Pegasus has, of course, in droves, but on Earth, some of them belonged to people John knew, and he got to be cool (if mostly absent) Uncle John. It was the closest he thought he'd ever get to being a father, and although he has it now with Torren, he kind of wishes he didn't, because at least on Earth, he didn't feel like he'd eventually leave and never see his pseudo-nieces and nephews ever again.


Living with someone. He's actually pretty good at it, not hogging the shower and picking up his dirty laundry and not playing the radio too loud, and he can never understand why that surprised people. Civilians; military officers are never surprised, because they're like him, lived a good chunk of their adult lives with other people right there all the time, and they know you either learn to be good at it or learn to like being a pain in the ass to everyone around you. Atlantis is almost enough, with everyone living in one small part of the city, but still; he'd gotten used to the sound of someone else breathing while he fell asleep, and he still hasn't managed, after all this time, to quite stop listening for it, even though he knows it isn't there.

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